Monday, June 26, 2006

I am the Commander in Chief!

I am the Commander in Chief!

Bevin Chu
June 25, 2006

我是三軍統帥! I am the Commander in Chief!
-- 沉尿扁 Chen Shui-bian

Some readers may be wondering what this posting is all about.

It's quite simple, actually.

Chen Shui-bian, feeling the heat from the Pan Blue initiated recall process, has been sweating bullets.

Why is Chen so afraid of being recalled?

Chen is afraid of being recalled because during the four years he legally occupied the office of the president, followed by the two years he illegally occupied the office of the president, he
committed so many crimes he can't afford to allow himself to be recalled.

The moment Chen is recalled is the moment Chen loses control of the judiciary. The moment Chen loses control of the judiciary is the moment Chen and his wife will suffer the same fate as former Philippines kleptocrats Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos, and former South Korean kleptocrats Chun Doo-hwan and Roe Tae-woo.

Therefore in order to prove that he still had his hand on the controls of the central government, Chen ordered an impromptu troop review on the island of Kinmen (Jingmen),
just off the coast of Fujian.

The troop review, which Chen called for out of the blue, for no apparent rhyme or reason, was not about anything so mundane as actually reviewing the troops for their military preparedness.

The "troop review" was Chen's laughable attempt to assert that "I'm still in charge goddammit!" The troop review was a trembling Chen, puckering his lips, dry from anxiety, whistling in the dark.

Actually, the photo above was not taken on Kinmen. It was taken earlier, elsewhere. But doesn't it look perfect for the caption? And what's a little artistic license now and then?

For the record, here is the actual scene, at a luncheon with officers serving on the frontline island of Kinmen:

Caption: Inspecting Kinmen, the president declares: I am the Commander in Chief!

The Taipei Times, apparently unconcerned about the potential for ironic commentary from what the Pan Green camp likes to call the "tong pai mei ti" (pro unification media), reported on Chen's latest bout of petulance.

In a June 23, 2006 article entitled "I'm commander-in-chief, Chen says," the Taipei Times wrote:

Against the backdrop of the recall motion initiated by the opposition, President Chen Shui-bian emphasized yesterday that he is the commander-in-chief of the armed forces ...

"Everybody knows that the president is the commander-in-chief of the armed forces because it is clearly stipulated in Article 36 of the Constitution," he said. "But exactly what does that mean?"

Quoting words attributed to former US president John F. Kennedy in the Hollywood movie Thirteen Days, Chen said that all military chains of command end with the president.

"That is the meaning of the leader of the armed forces," Chen said.

"To be the commander-in-chief of the armed forces is my constitutional duty and the sacred mission vested in me by the people. For that reason, I am willing to be on duty 365 days of the year without any holidays."

Wow. I hope you're duly impressed by Chen's importance. He certainly is.

"President" Chen Shui-bian waves as he sets out from Shuitou Harbor on Kinmen to inspect troops on Tatan Island and Little Kinmen during an inspection tour yesterday

IN CHARGE: The embattled president paid a visit to the armed forces on Kinmen and Tatan and reminded the public that all military chains of command ended with him

Chen said: "There are some people who refuse to recognize me as the president of Taiwan. They refuse to address me as the president, but refer to me with my full name as if they were calling their child," he said.

Now why in the world would they do that?

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